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March 8, 2006

Adventures with Bruce - The Flu Gets a Swift Kick in the Head

by Ferdinand T Cat

Bruce is fuzzy-brained at the best of times, but sometimes he out-does himself. He found that an arrangement of pillows on the couch in the music room would enable him to sit completely upright, which minimizes the chance of a cough. When the muscles in your head and neck are already inflamed, coughing is so painful that you will do anything to avoid it.

Anyway, sometime last night he drifted off to sleep, at which point the flaw in the pillow arrangement manifested itself and he fell over to one side, skillfully banging his head against the wooden table next to the couch and knocking himself unconscious. It was the first real sleep he's had since Sunday, and today he's actually feeling better.

In any case, I'm trying to convince him that another blow to the head will knock him out long enough for a complete cure, but apparently, when the muscles in your head and neck are inflamed, a swift strike with a basball bat is even scarier than a cough.

Respectfully submitted,

Ferdinand T. Cat


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Comments

I think I'd haev nightmares if I found out Al Gore was running for the Presidency...


Posted by: Lan Whu at March 8, 2006 3:05 PM

We have the flu at our house, a nice long period of unconsciousness would be a blessing..
Do you think you can teach Tigger to
A. move furniture or
B. Swing a bat?
Pet


Posted by: Pet Campbell at March 8, 2006 4:17 PM

Yipes, sounds painful on many levels.

Can you let Bruce know I wish him well.

All I can envision now is a Ferdinand skulking up behind him with a baseball bat, ready to bop him on the head, lol.


Posted by: Sam at March 9, 2006 1:48 AM

P R O P H E C Y O F F A M I N E
Its extremely important that you realize the following prophecy is solidly based on Holy Scripture, not the desires or thoughts of man. Therefore please refer to the SCRIPTURAL SUPPORT link in the left column at any point while reading the following prophecy, or perhaps before continuing.

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PROPHECY OF PESTILENCE THEN FAMINE
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Before the sun sets on the year 2006, and to be noticeable by September 1, 2006, America will experience the worst Influenza Pandemic in all history. The coming pandemic will be far worse than the flu pandemic of 1918 which killed tens of millions of Americans, and will be unrelated to what is now being called the bird flu pandemic.

The coming pandemic will be spread throughout America by way of its crops which will be poisoned by the toxic flood waters of Katrina. These toxic waters were pumped into the Gulf of Mexico then back washed up America's rivers. The toxic waters will continue to travel throughout America in a way similar to the spread of acid rain, which has killed many of our trees. As a result, our food supply will have to be cut off by the government, and the flu pandemic will then be compounded by a famine so severe that men will eat their own children.
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The pandemic and famine will be brought on by America's so called "church" leaders allowing merchants to set their detestable things in The Lord's House, using His House as a commercial storefront to sell merchandise, thereby causing America's churches to seem like a den of thieves to non believers. All of which is being done AFTER The Lord has made it clear that His House is to be a place of prayer.
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NOT a place of commerce. NOT for entertainment. NOT a social event.
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A PLACE OF PRAYER ! !
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Therefore a third of you will die from the pandemic; a third will die from the famine, leaving a third to mourn for the other two thirds. The remaining third shall know without question that HE is The LORD, ALMIGHTY GOD. It will be a thousand years before any man returns to worshipping the false god of gold, silver, iron, brass, clay, or wood, the god of materialism that can neither see, nor move, nor speak, nor respond to man in any way. The same false god you yourself have insisted on placing before the Lord, your God, The Holy One Of Israel. Neither will any man return to the worship of any of his materialistic ways during this time.
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The sword of The Lord is now pointed at the right eye of your leaders and they are made blind to the truth. His sword is now pointed at the right ear of those who lead your church and they are made deaf to The Holy Word of GOD. His Sword is now pointed at your right arm, and you are made utterly defenseless. Yet, for a short time THE LORD will continue to spiritually feed you, the flock that He knows is doomed to slaughter, by cutting off your proverbial claws so you won't still be prancing around in your stupor of arrogance when HE utterly destroys the nation you hold so dear.
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You have been enslaved in a more severe manner than ancient Egypt had ever hoped to enslave God's people, and you are too ill informed to even know it. You as a nation have gone mad over your idols; over the monster car, truck, or SUV you now have parked in your driveway so you can impress your friends and neighbors by using it to haul one person around to shop for more false gods until you drop; then run to tell others that God gave those things to you; which HE absolutely did NOT! You in fact have traded your soul to the god of hell so you could have them!
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You think not !!
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Just hide and watch. See how quickly all those things are taken from you by your friends and neighbors, who will hate you when the famine comes which GOD is sending your way to recompense you for your evil ways, and for the lies you have had to tell in order to obtain those things.
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"GOD wants me to have all these things," you proclaim! "In heaven I will walk on streets of gold," you proudly add!! The second statement should have told you something. By that statement you should realize that GOD abhors both you AND your riches to such a degree that HE will use your gold to pave His streets! However, unless you amend your ways very quickly, and seek HIS forgiveness on your knees while HE is still willing to continue to Spiritually feed you, you will never see it.
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Then shall the great fire come; Then shall The Lord bring that third through the fire and refine them as gold is refined and silver is purified; Then shall they call HIM their Lord, and HE call those third His people; Then as HE looks down shall one third of the earth be darkened by smoke, and the sun and moon will no longer give their light to that third of the earth which is made up by your continent and your neighbor to the south; Then, shall one third of earth's rivers and streams be made bitter; Then shall one third of the earth's seas be turned to blood. It will be YOUR blood spilled; YOUR carcass upon which the birds of the heavens feed; YOUR continent that is no more; and, YOUR land that God will use to create His infamous Lake of Fire. He will burn the very dirt itself, feeding the fire with your own black carbon deposits (brimstone), thereby creating the literal place known as hell.
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Then and only then shall Jesus, The Risen Christ, return to Reign over what remains of the earth declaring it His Kingdom. NOT TIL THEN !

Then, after 1.000 years of Jesus' reign, when the earth will eventually become uninhabitable due to the great fire, will ALMIGHTY GOD create all new things, to include a new Heaven and a new Earth, and unless you act now to get your life right with THE LORD, you won't be part of it !!
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You are free to hate me all you want. You are free to ignore what I have told you for as long as you want. But I have just told you The Word of The Most High GOD. Take it up with Him !! Open your heart and listen to what He has to say to you!!!

HE may listen to complaints. I will not.
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... And I am by no means finished.
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Thus said The Lord GOD of Israel to me, vince diehl.

YOU MAY PUBLISH THIS AND REDISTRIBUTE THIS BUT UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD ANYONE AT ANYTIME TAKE MONEY OR DONATIONS FOR THIS FREE MESSAGE.


Posted by: SALVATIONISYAHSHUAH at March 9, 2006 3:53 PM

well that's the longest comment spam ever!

Tell Bruce to get better. I find alcohol also works. I read the bottle on cough syrup, and I thought to myself "why not skip the middle man". Whiskey helps (or in tea with honey) esp. to help sleep.


Posted by: PlutosDad [TypeKey Profile Page] at March 10, 2006 8:39 AM

HTML is not allowed in comments; however, if you put in a raw URL (http://www.somewhere.com/page.html) it will automatically be converted to a link.. Also, it is likely your comment will not appear unless you refresh the page manually after posting it.

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