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April 30, 2006
Notes from Ferdy - The Hollywood Code
The DaVinci Code is getting hyped like crazy as we approach its release date. The book is a fictional account of a conspiracy to conceal the fact that Jesus married and had children, implying that the whole thing with the crucifixion and resurrection was a hoax.
The book is an excellent conspiracy thriller, but Brown has been painting the book as something based on reality, even going so far as to participate in a documentary on the subject. Mr. Brown plays a clever game here: if any particular concept portrayed as historical fact in the book proves to be false, he can claim dramatic license. Thus, the overall conspiracy theory remains intact regardless of the evidence. The next time Dan Rather wants to discredit a Republican Presidential candidate, he should do it as a fictional thriller. No one would be able to stop him. Now that I think of it, this idea that reporters are objectively recording facts rather than making things up that could be true is why the media has such a low reputation. We should cancel the Nightly News and have the Nightly Fact-Based Thrilller instead.
Anyway, conspiracy groups in books and film are much more powerful than they are in real life. For example, in books the freemasons control governments and hush up murders. In real life they throw wild parties and have parades. Similarly, in the movies, the CIA has an illegal cadre of super-assassins, but in real life Osama bin Laden is still alive.
In particular, there is no 200-year-old conspiracy to discredit Christianity any more than there is a .200-year-old conspiracy for teenagers to disobey their parents. As long as there are people who want to disobey Christ's rules, there will be people who want to prove Christ isn't all he's cracked up to be.
But the real issue is whether or not Christianity provides a moral code that works. Based on his experience as a father, Bruce believes very strongly that it does. That's debatable. Nonetheless, there is one thing that is not debatable: the Hollywood moral code is a complete disaster. There is in fact an entire industry devoted to chronicling the failure of the Hollywood code, and it assaults people at the checkout lines of supermarkets everywhere.
So don't let it get to you, and don't get trapped into the same mode of thinking that produced the hype surrounding The DaVinci Code. It may seem that the people debunking Christianity are having a grand old time, but the only prize you win in that particular game is time-sharing your children with a bunch of strangers. It's not worth it.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Sun 9:03 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (1) | More Notes from Ferdy
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The Dimwit Zone - Amazing New Weight-Loss Product
When you see an ad for a new weight-loss supplement, do you wonder whether or not it's just another scam? Wonder no more with Liquid Loss!
Liquid Loss contains over one hundred different minerals and compounds, carefully measured to the exact proportion they are found in the ocean water from which all life arose. Combined with diet and exercise, Liquid Loss will cause you to lose as much weight as diet and exercise alone. But it gets even better! Despite its proven track record, Liquid Loss costs much less than other weight-loss supplements, and it's 100% natural, just like arsenic and sulphur dioxide!
So don't be fooled by other scams: use Liquid Loss and prove exactly how smart you are!
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Sun 2:44 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (1) | More The Dimwit Zone
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April 29, 2006
Adventures with Bruce - The Stuff of Which Dreams Are Made
Bruce is visiting Peg-Eye Nate at the University of Illinois this weekend and earlier today they ended up working together at the campus Starbucks. During the sojourn, Bruce got an opportunity to do something every parent dreams of: he asked if he could borrow Nate's credit card.
It is my understanding that Nate did yield the card, and the guy behind the counter at Starbucks intends to submit the incident to Ripley's Believe-it-or-Not.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Sat 9:05 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Adventures with Bruce
The Right Nation: Sleepy Sunday Open Trackback
Starboard!!!: LA Times Sacks Blog
Confused Americans for Truth - Memo to ABC Radio News
When you are describing the upcoming May Day march, please remember it's not about immigrant rights, it's about illegal immigrant rights. Also, it is not "wanting to work hard" that would be made a felony, it is sneaking into the country without going through lawful channels. There are billions of people out there who want to work hard, but if they all showed up at our doorstep it would be a serious problem.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Sat 5:25 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Confused Americans for Truth
April 28, 2006
Web Site News - A Rough Day to Be a Conservative Cat
A denial of service attack originating in Saudi Arabia took down Hosting Matters today, beginning roughly at 10am ET. The target was Aaron's CC, but our server is on the same section of the network as his, so even though most of the Hosting Matters blogs were back by early afternoon, we've been down until a few minutes ago.
It was rough for a while. Bruce is of course ecstatic that we're back with no data lost and doesn't care about anything else. Peg-Eye Nate is trying to convince our local congressman that we should declare war on Saudi Arabia. Me, I'm thinking we need to do database backups once a day instead of once a week.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Fri 9:45 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Web Site News
Web Site News - 11 Hours Without a Web Server
We're back! We're back! The nightmare is over! We have our blogs, we have our Wiki, we have our calendar, we have EMAIL, the nightmare is OVER!
Happy! Happy! Happy-full!
# At Fri 8:43 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Web Site News
Notes from Ferdy - Please Stop the Madness
Even a small annoyance can loom large when you see it over and over and over and over again.
So, if you know the person responsible for this particular spam atrocity, please point out these very important facts to him.
- While Viagra, Cialis, and Prozac perform important medical functions, it has nothing to do with curing disease.
- Please buy a dictionary because It's spelled D-I-S-E-A-S-E you TOTALLY BRAIN-DAMAGED MORON!
Thank you for your patience. We will resume our normal programming shortly.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Fri 12:27 AM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Notes from Ferdy
April 27, 2006
Funny Stuff - Thursday
- Yob's Blog: Sunglasses on Head??
- Basil's Blog: Headline News
- Eco Enquirer: Toronto Palm Fronds
- LawDog Files: Hah!
- Top One List: The Top One Way to Celebrate Cops' 650th Episode
Semi-Open Trackbacks: If you have something funny to share, link to this post and send a trackback, or submit it here and it will be considered for inclusion in the next roundup.
# At Thu 11:54 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Funny Stuff
Ipso Facto Comic Blog: Gun Control
Laura Ingraham - Mary Lynn and Laura
If you are a fan of the TV show 24, (which is apparently a fairly common thing on our side of the great divide), be sure to tune in to the Laura Ingraham Show tomorrow (Friday April 28) at 11am Eastern time, when Mary Lynn Rajskub (who plays Chloe O'Brian) will be Laura's guest.
Ms. Rajskub (pronounced "Rice-Cub") was a stand-up comedienne before she became a major sex symbol for nerds everywhere. If you're interested in her early work, you can check out the short film The Girls' Guitar Club, available online here [Language Warning]. Bruce thinks it's really funny, but I'm not sure that's a recommendation. Although, I must admit that the scene with the dead fish and the tape recorder is actually very much reminiscent of what Bruce is like when he's working with Macromedia Flash.
Anyway, tomorrow. Laura Ingraham Show Hour 3. Chloe the Computer Girl.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Thu 11:40 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Laura Ingraham
Catblogging - Indecision is an Awful Thing
Here you can see me with my ears back, which means I'm trying to recover from a strategic mistake. You may notice that I've made myself a nice, comfortable nest out of paper. Unfortunately, the papers I chose were the notes on Final Fantasy X belonging to The Girl Who Feeds Me. She is even as we speak searching the room for them. I love the Girl very much, but her temper is a very serious thing, and she is not at her best when a video game is going poorly. So, I'm trying to figure out if I would be better off getting up and fleeing or staying here and hoping she doesn't notice.
I love my pets, but it would be a lot easier if they came with detailed instructions.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Thu 11:09 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (1) | More Catblogging
Visit the commenters: Jenn
Ferdy at the Movies - Snakes on a Plane
I am generally a very tolerant individual, and though I do have standards for this blog, I am committed to the principle of free expression. I do, however, have limits, and they have been exceeded by this film.
This is a horror thriller, and in the trailer for this film, they show a caged cat being killed by a snake. Now, I can understand killing people in a horror thriller, because killing people in long, complicated scenes that are painful to watch is what horror thrillers are about. But now they're killing cats!
The whole purpose of cats is to protect humanity. If you start showing cats being killed, it's going to scare people on a level so deep that they won't know what's wrong until they wake up one morning in a straitjacket. Not only is this movie unworthy of an R, it's too awful for even an NC-17. I mean, really, people. At least give the poor cat a chance and let it out of the cage.
Call the MPAA Ratings Board and make sure they know that Snakes on a Plane must be stopped before it traumatizes an entire nation!
This is SERIOUS!
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Thu 10:02 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Ferdy at the Movies
April 26, 2006
Funny Stuff - Wednesday
- Basil's Blog: Headline News
- Vox Poplar: Top 10 Super Happy Fun Time!
- Cox and Forkum: Gas Fumes
Semi-Open Trackbacks: If you have something funny to share, link to this post and send a trackback, or submit it here and it will be considered for inclusion in the next roundup.
# At Wed 11:42 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Funny Stuff
Freedom Watch: Open Trackbacks Today
Blue Star Chronicles: What's Everybody Talking About Mid Week
Confused Americans for Truth - Texas Judge in Oily Scheme
I tell you, I try to be understanding, but this obsession with punishment over progress is just beyond irresponsible. The latest is a boycott of Exxon/Mobil, to commence immediately and to continue until they drop their pump price to $1.30. This is not the first time I've heard of such a scheme, though this is the first time I've read about it in the news. Usually it comes in as chain-letter EMAIL spam.
The beauty of such a scheme is that no one is going to pay attention, so you don't have to worry about the possibility of the thing blowing up in your face. That's a serious concern, because if people actually decided to buy gas from, say, British Petroleum instead of Exxon/Mobil, the price at the BP pumps will rise, and Exxon/Mobil, which can't possibly make a profit at $1.30 a gallon, will end up being gobbled up by a competitor.
The county judge who came up with this idea is quoted in the article.
Hey, the American people are tired. What we did is we simply took action instead of complaining. We're offering our residents a beacon of hope.
The problem is, the hope being offered is not the prospect of lower gas prices, but revenge on Exxon for giving its departing CEO a $400 million retirement package. The cost of the package is nothing compared to Exxon's profits, or even the taxes it pays.
Consider this: for each of its 85,000+ employees, Exxon Mobil is paying $271,269 in corporate income tax. That's not excise taxes, it's not fuel taxes, it's corporate income taxes. When people complain about how little they make compared to executives, it's worth noting that you could get a pretty sizable raise just from what the IRS is gouging off the top.
These large compensation packages are a result of the fact that there are not all that many people who even know how to manage an organization of 85,000 people, much less navigate the labyrinth of regulations put in place by a Congress that wants the energy industry to conform itself to the wishes of the Sierra Club.
But the point remains: when you want to do "something", it should be something positive. Increasing the misery is not positive, it's stupid. We don't need stupid right now.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Wed 10:46 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (3) | More Confused Americans for Truth
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April 25, 2006
Funny Stuff - Tuesday
- AbbaGav: Internecine Palestinian Squabble, Blow by Blow, With Pictures
- Point Five: Muslim Outrage Over al Qaeda Egypt Bombing
- Basil's Blog: Headline News
- Random Yak: Mow Ho, Mow Ho, a Gardener's Life for Me
Semi-Open Trackbacks: If you have something funny to share, link to this post and send a trackback, or submit it here and it will be considered for inclusion in the next roundup.
# At Tue 11:59 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Funny Stuff
Notes from Ferdy - Economics and Politics of High Oil Prices
Once again, it is a good time to review The Curse of Inventory Profits. One wonders why that article is not required reading for members of Congress.
In any case, the news today is that Bush has brought prices down by peeling back some regulations. This could be bad news for the Democrats, who stand to benefit in a big way if they can pin high gas prices on a Republican president. Fortunately, the Democrats have a plan to get the prices back up-- a windfall profits tax.
I was being a little harsh in that paragraph. The truth is, the Democrats think they're doing the right thing, it's just that the result will be to make things worse. And this is exactly what's wrong with policies based on fairness instead of economics. Before you pass a new law, your first question should be Will this make things better? If the answer is no, then you should consider another choice. Perhaps it really feels good to see another person punished for good fortune in bad times, but policy is not about feelings, it's about results.
It's important to remember that.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Tue 11:27 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (1) | More Notes from Ferdy
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The Bullwinkle Blog: Finals Are Almost Over
Confused Americans for Truth - World Net Daily Misses a Point
The top story at World Net Daily today is about a lawsuit against the Clintons. The plaintiff-- Peter Paul of Stan Lee Media-- claims he donated a million dollars to Hillary Clinton's 2000 Senate campaign in exchange for promotional services from her husband Bill Clinton.
There are a lot of opportunities for humor in this story. Bill Clinton is not exactly famous for keeping his word, and Hillary is not exactly famous for having anything to do with Bill. Alas, the entire thing is suspect because Peter Paul himself has a history of embezzlement and fraud.
It is true that when you're trying to circumvent campaign finance laws, the people who can make it happen are probably going to have a shady past. It's also true that Paul put together a massive fundraising gala for the Clintons that is at the center of an FEC investigation. This does not subtract, however, from the fact that Peter Paul is an idiot.
If you're going to make a back-room deal with a politician, your only leverage is the ability to go public should your co-conspirator fail to live up to his part of the bargain. The Clintons, however, are invulnerable. Despite setting several records for corruption among their staff, the Clintons have remained untouched.
In other words, there is no reason to get excited.
Conservatives are easy marks for stories like this because it seems so unfair that Republican scandals point to a "culture of corruption" while Democrat scandals are minor infractions that don't matter in the scheme of things. But we will never win the game of negative politics, because it gives the advantage to the team that has the fewest ideas.
That's not who we are, and it's not who we want to be.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Tue 11:21 AM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Confused Americans for Truth
April 24, 2006
Funny Stuff - Monday
- either orr: Whose country is it anyway?
- Basil's Blog: Headline News
- Peace Moonbeam: Scooter's Report
- Nose On Your Face: Top Nine Things that Piss Off Osama bin Ladin
Semi-Open Trackbacks: If you have something funny to share, link to this post and send a trackback, or submit it here and it will be considered for inclusion in the next roundup.
# At Mon 11:09 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (3) | More Funny Stuff
Visit the commenters: Taffy Rabbit Ferdy Taffy Rabbit
Freedom Watch: It's that time of the week again
Laura Ingraham - Iraq Forms New Government, Bush Blamed
The top story on today's Laura Ingraham show was the fact that the four-month deadlock in Iraq has been broken and they have begun to form a government. Laura bemoaned the fact that that this was not considered big news.
The new government represents a compromise between Iraq's three factions: the Speaker of the Parliament is Mahmoud al-Mashhadani, a Sunni; the Prime Minister is Jawad al-Maliki, a Shi'a; and the President is Jalal Talabani, a Kurd. Talabani is beginning his second term in the post of President. The official view of the mainstream media is that Iraq cannot hope to escape a sectarian breakup, and in fact if you're looking for news stories about the new Iraqi government you'll get more results by searching for Iraq sectarian violence than Iraq new government.
History has given us many examples of nations tearing themselves apart with ethnic violence, but at some point we should stop acting as if that's our only choice. Here in America people get all bent out of shape over a team mascot, but we we seem to believe we can't do a thing about ethnic strife abroad.
Wait, I'm wrong. Even Howard Dean thought we had a moral obligation to intervene in Bosnia. Why is Bosnia a moral obligation while Iraq is an impossible dream? Probably because we had nothing to gain in Bosnia. There is something wholesome about a selfless act, and liberals are particularly vulnerable to the appearance of moral wholesomeness.
But if we can have peace in Bosnia, we can have peace in Iraq. To a sophisticated intellectual like Howard Dean, it may make perfect sense that Europeans can live in peace but that Arabs are not quite yet ready for it. But to me, it doesn't matter that someone's ancestors came from Europe, the Middle East, or some unknown island in the Pacific. What matters is the species. Every felis sylvestris knows this, and quite frankly, you homo sapiens better figure it out soon if you want to maintain your position at the top of the food chain.
Make sure Howard Dean gets the message.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Mon 10:15 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Laura Ingraham
April 23, 2006
Funny Stuff - Weekend
- Living the Scientific Life (Scientist, Interrupted): Alert: Bird Flu Strikes Florida Trailer Park!
- AbbaGav: Effective New Long-Term Weapon Against Terror
- The Skwib: Rozie
- Don Surber: The Nathan Hale Mary Pass
- Scrappleface: No Prize Again in Pulitzer ‘Non-Treason’ Category
- Eyes on the Ball: Chernobyl Radiation Mutates, Creates Super Predators
Semi-Open Trackbacks: If you have something funny to share, link to this post and send a trackback, or submit it here and it will be considered for inclusion in the next roundup.
# At Sun 11:57 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Funny Stuff
Stingray: a blog for salty Christians: A somber anniversary: Jimmy Carter and the Killer Rabbit
GINA COBB: Bird Flu Strikes in Florida
Carnivals - Rimfire Roundup Carnival
The Rimfire Roundup has been added to the Carnival Submit Form. This is a Carnival about rimfire shooting, featuring links to blog posts about all aspects of rimfire shooting and shooting sports. It's not limited to any particular caliber, only to the basic rimfire cartridge used. Rimfire rifles, pistols, cartridge history, match information, mod's and upgrades, gun reviews, range reports, anything rimfire! Submissions are due every Tuesday, 10pm ET, and guidelines can be found here.
# At Sun 11:05 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Carnivals
Windows Hell - Norton vs. USB Drives
Perhaps you have run into the following problem with your Windows PC. You have a USB drive with a fairly high capacity, and when you decide you want to eject it, you give the order to the little Safely Remove Hardware icon, but Windows tells you that the drive cannot be stopped right now and you should try again later. If you try yanking the drive without doing the Safe Remove, you get a delayed write failure. Yet you are not running any applications, and you know you're not using that drive for anything any more.
The culprit in this case is a feature of Norton Utilities called Norton File Protection. If you're using Norton File Protection, your recycle bin will be called Norton Protected Recycle Bin, and there will probably be a little shield with an N on it attached to the icon. Norton File Protection keeps track of deleted files, even after they've been cleared from the recycle bin. This makes it easier to recover lost data, but it comes at a price. Once the Norton Protection kicks in for a drive, it opens a control file on the drive and keeps it open, preventing you from ejecting the drive. Worse, even if the drive is configured for Quick Removal, Norton Protection activates delayed writing. This makes the performance hit from Norton Protection minimal, but it also means your drive's directory could get seriously mangled due to a delayed write failure.
So, your best bet is to turn off Norton File Protection. It means you'll lose some recoverability, but it makes your removable drives behave in a much more stable fashion, and that's nothing to sneeze at.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Sun 10:07 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Windows Hell
Confused Americans for Truth - Bin Laden Continues Search for Relevancy With New Tape
To a certain extent, you can't blame the mainstream media for reporting on new threats from Osama bin Laden, because after all he is the most wanted man in the world. On the other hand, it is silly to imply that the threats in this new tape have any relevance to life here in America. Since late 2004, bin Laden has been promising dire consequences for Americans, but they have yet to materialize. Perhaps it is the Bush Administration working behind the scenes, or perhaps al-Qaeda can't be bothered with bin Laden because it is too busy trying to prevent the advent of democracy in Iraq. Either way, the man is no longer a player in this game.
This is very bad for the Democrats, because catching bin Laden is the heart of their anti-terror strategy. Stop a moment and think about it: if bin Laden were captured, would Iran abandon its nuclear program? Would the Iraqi insurgents lay down their arms?
And finally, if Osama bin Laden were captured, would it decrease the number of terror attacks on American soil? No, because there hasn't been a successful terror attack here since the twin towers fell in 2001.
It's nice to have a single man against whom you can focus your attack, because once he's gone you can declare victory and go back to living the carefree life. But radical Islam is a lot bigger than one man, and the capture of bin Laden will not end the War on Terror any more than the capture of Saddam ended the Iraq insurgency.
That's why it would be a bad thing to let the Democrats win in November: they're still clueless. Trust me on this one.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Sun 9:37 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (2) | More Confused Americans for Truth
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123beta: Open Trackback Weekend
Web Site News - A Brief Interruption
Things will be unstable while I'm working on a way to thwart the evil Jhony, who has figured out how to get through our trackback spam filter.
# At Sun 10:54 AM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Web Site News
April 20, 2006
Laura Ingraham - Laura on the China Problem
Chinese President Hu Jintao is visiting the White House, and more than one heckler has castigated Hu on such topics as censorship, sweat-shop labor, and suppression of religion. On today's show, Laura Ingraham chose to concentrate on a single, particularly heartbreaking story, the slow extermination of China's female population.
The story has been around for a long time. The Chinese are only allowed one child per family. Since girls are considered bad luck, expectant mothers have been using ultrasound equipment to determine an unborn baby's gender, and aborting if the fetus is female. China's solution to the problem is typically totalitarian: it's now illegal to try and find out the sex of an unborn child.
As with Iran, it's worthwhile asking why the liberals aren't adding their voices to the chorus of China's critics. I'm guessing it's because they don't understand what's really going on in China. So I'm going to set the record straight.
People, China is not America's enemy. China is working closely with many top corporate executives, including Bill Gates, who not only runs Microsoft, but looks suspiciously like the bad guy in the Sandra Bullock movie The Net. And while it is true that China is anti-Christian, it's also anti-Buddhist, anti-Jewish, and anti-Muslim. In other words, they are trying to stamp out multiculturalism!
So now that you know the truth, it's time to take off the kid gloves and set your sights on President Hu. Remember, in a couple of years Bush will be out of office no matter what you do, but this Hu guy is going to keep on keeping on until someone has the courage to put his policies under the lights.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Thu 11:58 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (2) | More Laura Ingraham
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Funny Stuff - Thursday
- Right Jokester: Mediterranean Diet
- Basil's Blog: Headline News
- Scrappleface: Campaign Promotes Work by ‘Extra-Legal Americans’
- Winger: Bummed
- Cox & Forkum: Farce of Nature
- Nose on Your Face: Ike Turner On Iraqi Women's Rights
- Life is a Buffet: You're Late
- The MoxArgon Group: And You Eat Tofu with Those Mouths?
- Living the Scientific Life (Scientist, Interrupted): Teacher Arrested At JFK Airport in NYC
Semi-Open Trackbacks: If you have something funny to share, link to this post and send a trackback, or submit it here and it will be considered for inclusion in the next roundup.
# At Thu 11:57 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Funny Stuff
Pirate's Cove: Earth Day! Save It, Wash A Hippy!
Catblogging - Searching for Children
Every so often, I discover another reason to be unhappy that Peg-Eye Nate has gone off to college. In the old days, the house was full of children, so when I wanted some attention it was always available. Now, however, with their childhood live-in best friend occupying in a college dorm downstate, the girls have found other friends who live in other houses, and they are forever talking on the phone, going on sleepovers, and other girlie stuff. So here I am, getting ready to settle into my favorite chair, and there's nobody around to give me a good skritching. It's a major nuisance.
Bruce says this is all temporary and Nate will be coming home for the whole summer in another month. It can't happen soon enough if you ask me.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Thu 9:19 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (1) | More Catblogging
Visit the commenters: PJ and The Boyz
Modulator: Friday Ark #83
Adventures with Bruce - Important Safety Tips
Part of the fun of living with Bruce is that you learn so many bits of knowledge that most people take for granted. Here are two things I've learned recently.
- Vaseline is a fluid. If you leave a jar of it lying on its side, over a period of several weeks it will slowly flow out and coat everything else on the bottom of the suitcase.
- If you have one of those fancy bluetooth cell phone earpieces that's so comfortable you hardly know you're wearing it, you should check your ear before you step into the shower.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Thu 3:20 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Adventures with Bruce
April 19, 2006
Funny Stuff - Wednesday
- Ann Coulter: Lie Down With Strippers, Wake Up with Pleas
- Basil's Blog: Headline News
- Scheiss Weekly: What Time Is It Now?
- Right Jokester: Wal-Mart
- Scrappleface: U.S. Generals Call for Resignation of Media Leaders
- Random Yak: Obsessive-Compulsive Awareness Work-It-Out Day
- Lawdog: You Know...
- Samantha Burns: iPod Flea
Semi-Open Trackbacks: If you have something funny to share, link to this post and send a trackback, or submit it here and it will be considered for inclusion in the next roundup.
# At Wed 11:33 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Funny Stuff
Confused Americans for Truth - The Key Question to Ask About Rumsfeld
The war against Donald Rumsfeld is kicking into high gear. Don Surber and Tribuna Libre both have interesting comments on the nature of the complaint against the Secretary of Defense, but to me, there's only one question that needs to be asked: how will getting rid of Rumsfeld help us win in Iraq?
In a sufficiently large organization, the person in charge gets advice from hundreds of different channels, filtered through a shifting cadre of subordinates. No matter what decision is made, there will be somebody whose advice was passed over. To come back years later and claim you were unjustly ignored is not all that different from a psychic who gets the front page of a tabloid because he was the one out of a hundred who guessed the correct number of hurricanes.
The generals are getting traction because the media believes Iraq is a failure. Rumsfeld doesn't (audio link). It sure as heck hasn't been a milk run over there, but the past six months have shown a downward trend in American deaths. In addition, during her recent trip to Iraq, Laura Ingraham found many reasons for optimism.
If Rumsfeld were replaced, what would change? Perhaps he'd listen to different people. But every Secretary of Defense is going to have to make the same choices, and those choices will be strongly influenced by a President who is not going to change.
Perhaps some people hope that a new Secretary of Defense would be more willing to pack up and go home, leaving the Iraqis to their own devices. But does anybody think the absence of U.S. forces will cause the terrorists in Iraq to give up? Or will they in fact go into high gear and take over like they did in Afghanistan? If these generals are so damn smart, then I want them to tell me how they will fix things over there. If the Iraq war is not going well, then we don't need a new Secretary of Defense, we need a new plan for victory. And if we're not getting that, then there's no difference between Rumsfeld's critics and a psychic who correctly predicted the Indian Ocean tsunami and completely missed the Katrina disaster.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Wed 6:02 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Confused Americans for Truth
April 18, 2006
EMAIL Hell - The Amazing Disappearing Microsoft Lottery Prize
Somebody mixed the old Microsoft EMAIL hoax with the slightly more recent lottery hoax and came up with this.
Dear Lucky winner,
WINNING NOTIFICATION
The prestigious Micrsoft and aol has set out and sucessfully organised a Sweepstakes marking the end of year anniversary we rolled out over (Two million Great Britain Pounds) for our Annual Draws. Participants for the draws were randomly selected and drawn from a wide range of web hosts which we enjoy their patronage.
To make the message appear less convincing, most of it is rendered in Lucida Cursive, a decorative font that is only supposed to be used for titles and headings. It's okay in small doses, as you can see to the left, but a whole page of the stuff will make your eyes water.
Even though I am a superior life form, I have to admit I could never pull off a scam like this one. I keep thinking of how my potential victims would be analyzing the message. For example, there is no sign of this Sweepstakes anywhere on the Microsoft web site. Thus, in order to fall for this hoax, you have to accept that Microsoft would want to spend millions of dollars on a secret publicity stunt. Worse, the announcement they're sending out regarding this secret publicity stunt specifies an EMAIL address belonging to a Polish portal domain. Trust me, if there's a million dollars at stake, the people running the contest should be able to cough up the $9.95 a month it costs to get a real MSN EMAIL address.
This has got to stop. Tell your friends and neighbors to stay clear of these idiotically transparent scams. If you're going to get scammed, make sure it's a scam with skill and polish, and not some pathetic tome in broken English from somebody too cheap to get a real EMAIL account.
We have to have standards or this whole civilization is going to fall apart.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Tue 11:59 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (2) | More EMAIL Hell
Visit the commenters: Bonnie Underfoot Victor Tabbycat
basil's blog: Picnic 2006-04-20
Funny Stuff - Tuesday
- Basil's Blog: Headline News
- Vox Poplar: The Great Zbornak Sees All, Tells All, Knows Nothing!
- Schiess Weekly: Movie Review Verdict: Boring and Stupid
- Point Five: Donald Rumsfeld Resignation Advisory System
- EcoEnquirer: New Environmental Fear-- Earth "Spinning out of control"
- Random Yak: Irony, Thy Name is Observance
Semi-Open Trackbacks: If you have something funny to share, link to this post and send a trackback, or submit it here and it will be considered for inclusion in the next roundup.
# At Tue 11:36 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Funny Stuff
Freedom Watch: How to talk to a liberal - Opps, I mean a conserva
April 17, 2006
Funny Stuff - Monday
- The Secret Life of Gary: A Brief History of Rochester
- The MoxArgon Group: Intergalactic Roundtable 4
- Point Five: Six Former Ice Cream Truck Drivers Call For Rumsfeld Resignation
- Basil's Blog: Headline News
- Follow That Star: Free Meal Ticket
- Top One List: The Top One CBS Perk for Perky Katie Couric
Semi-Open Trackbacks: If you have something funny to share, link to this post and send a trackback, or submit it here and it will be considered for inclusion in the next roundup.
# At Mon 11:59 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Funny Stuff
Starboard!!!: Jordan Accuses Hamassholes of Smuggling Weapons
Starboard!!!: Forrestal Remembered by National Geographic
Notes from Ferdy - Some May Call It Garbage
but to the Gremlin it's a science project.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Mon 10:22 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Notes from Ferdy | Tags: humor The Gremlin
April 16, 2006
Funny Stuff - Weekend
- Scrappleface: Pope Shocks Easter Crowd, Doffs Cap and Gown
- Buzz Patrol: The Easter Bunny Hates You [Hat Tip: IMAO]
- Peace Moonbeam: Whale Rescue
- The Skwib: Local Man Wins Big After Rolling Up Rim
Semi-Open Trackbacks: If you have something funny to share, link to this post and send a trackback, or submit it here and it will be considered for inclusion in the next roundup.
# At Sun 9:19 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Funny Stuff
Confused Americans for Truth - The SUV Thing
In an earlier article, I proposed sending all the liberals to Iran so they can put a stop to a dangerous example of nuclear proliferation. Apparently, one of them took offense, and offered the following criticism.
If you say send all liberals to Iran, I would say, send all SUV drivers there as well. SUV drivers finance anti-Americans in Saudi Arabia, Venezuela, Russia etc..
This is, of course, a ridiculous assertion. Only a tiny fraction of what you pay for an SUV actually ends up being used to buy TV commercials, and really I would only characterize CBS, NBC, and ABC as truly "Anti-American".
So I think it would be okay to let the SUV owners stay here.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Sun 8:29 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Confused Americans for Truth
Confused Americans for Truth - Common Nonsense About Illegal Immigration
The real problem with illegal immigration is not that it hurts the American worker. The American worker has survived decades of illegal immigration and is doing just fine. It is not security. That's a concern, but it applies equally to our northern border, and no one is asking to build a fence there.
No, the real problem is the mindset of the welfare state, as displayed prominently in the New York Times. According to the Times, if we stop giving free medical care to illegal aliens, it's going to raise the price of going to the hospital for the rest of us. See, the hospital has to treat them regardless of whether or not they can pay, so if the government isn't paying for them, the hospitals will have to raise their prices to compensate.
This makes a lot of sense if you're the sort of person who believes money from the government grows on trees rather than being collected from the citizenry in the form of taxes. We're all paying for the principle of free hospital care regardless of whether the money goes through an insurance company via our employer or the Department of Health and Human Servies via the IRS. So, let's not pretend health care costs are the problem.
The problem is accomodation. We have to support the chidren of illegal aliens in our schools, and we have to have a bilingual school system to make it happen. We have to pay them welfare when they can't find a job, and we have to pay their medical bills when they get hurt. The government does this because we don't want to see people suffer just because they want a better life. Even I, a predator completely devoid of compassion, feel a qualm about saying to a family of four they have to sleep on the street because they weren't supposed to be here in the first place.
But that qualm is expensive. The fact that schools in California are tightening their belts due to a budget crunch casts the $7.7 billion spent on the children of illegals in a very unfavorable light.
The advantage of a guest-worker program is that it gets the illegals onto the tax rolls so that they are paying into the system from which they draw benefits. But we went through this same exercise 20 years ago and we're back to where we started. We're going to be back here again in 20 more years unless we stop having these compassionate qualms.
You can have compassion, or you can have illegal immigration, but you can't have both.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Sun 7:56 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (4) | More Confused Americans for Truth
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Adventures with Bruce - It All Depends on How You Look at It
I would like to thank all the people who have expressed sympathy for Bruce's situation at work regarding the Typo3 Content Management System. Briefly, Bruce dropped out of sight for the better part of a week because he had to update a web site that used the Typo3 product for managing its content, and the Main Tech Guy-- who knows how Typo3 works-- was unavailable because he had to go to a dog show.
Anyway, there has been a revolt in the user community and they've decided to convert to an ordinary HTML site without any productivity tools. I, of course, am upset that Bruce wasted all that time trying to get Typo3 to work, but Bruce sees it differently: now that we're not using a productivity tool, he can get the web site updates through in a small fraction of the time it took for this one.
See, that is a very cat-like way of looking at things. Instead of complaining about the past, you think about what you need to do in the future.
But even a superior life form has limits, and these limits are right in the vicinity of the phrase "dog show". So I'm thinking, the next time the Main Tech Guy needs a vacation, instead of a dog show he should visit a local hospital so Bruce could call him on the phone.
It all depends on how you look at it.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Sun 2:53 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Adventures with Bruce
Podcasts - Maggie vs. Sephiroth
Bruce's daughter Maggie has spent large portions of the last two days fighting one of the Kingdom Hearts II game bosses-- a guy named Sephiroth. Kingdom Hearts is a very strange video game that blends characters from the Final Fantasy games with Disney cartoon characters. The player controls a party consisting of a player character, Goofy, Donald Duck, and a fourth character who varies from world to world.
Anyway, for those of you who don't have electronically-aligned children, I thought it would be useful to record the last hour of Maggie's battle. Of course, this is a family-friendly blog, so I had to remove all the cursing, the hysterical screaming, and the especially tender father-daughter moment when Bruce asked "How come you keep losing?" and Maggie threw the controller at him.
The result is five seconds of silence.
Hey, at least I tried.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat
# At Sun 1:41 PM | Permalink | Trackback URI | Comments (0) | More Podcasts
April 15, 2006
Confused Americans for Truth - Make Electricity, Not Missiles!
Okay, I've just about had enough of this whole Iran thing.
Gina Cobb has an update on Iran's latest hissing fit. Apparently, if we attack Iran, they're going to send terrorists into Iraq to take it away from us.
This is what comes from basing your foreign policy on what you read in The New York Times. Revolutionary Guard General Yahya Rahim Safav would be better to base his strategy on what the military is actually doing in Iraq. Still, the irony of the situation is so thick you could build a skyscraper out of it.
Here in the West, we have an economy that is constantly threatened by our dependence on oil. So what are we doing to fix the situation? We are trying to convert from cars that use fossil fuels to cars that use electricity generated by fossil fuels. This is like using cigarettes to wean yourself off a dependency on nicotine patches.
Iran, on the other hand, is sitting on one of the largest oil reserves in the world, and it's building nuclear reactors. An oil-rich nation needs nuclear energy for only one reason-- as a cover for building nuclear weapons. The Western powers, who already have nukes but could really use the extra electricity, can't build nuclear reactors because they're full of liberals. We have to help Iran build them, however, so that we don't look like bullies.
There is a simple, obvious, and guaranteed solution to this situation: export all the liberals to Iran. Iran will have to abandon its nuclear program in exchange for solar power or some other trendy alternative source, and they'll be unable to finance an invasion of Israel because they'll be too busy saving the rain forest.
Quite frankly, Iran is one of those few places where a massive influx of liberals would do a lot of good.
Respectfully submitted,
Ferdinand T. Cat