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November 27, 2007

Notes from Ferdy - In Which I Bravely Submit Myself as a Subject for Medical Testing

by Ferdinand T Cat

This story has been popping up all over the place in the past few days. In essence, there is a recent surge in cases of rickets, a bone disease caused by a lack of vitamin D, phosphates, or calcium.

Vitamin D is the most important. For best results, you want vitamin D3, also known as cholecalciferol. This is the form of vitamin D produced by sunlight. It produces a hormone that helps to manage the levels of phosphates and calcium in your system, and that management is critical: for example, insufficient calcium leads to bone problems, while too much calcium causes a cholesterol buildup.

If you're getting the right amount of vitamin D, the other thing you need is calcium the body can use as building blocks for bone tissue. A great source of this vital nutrient is mozzarella cheese, which is packaged for snack purposes as string cheese. I believe that encouraging children to eat string cheese snacks could be the answer to this whole problem.

What we need is a series of tests to determine if increasing the cheese in your diet is sufficient to protect you from rickets. For best results, these tests should be run on a small, fur-bearing mammal. A small mammal's faster metabolism will produce results more quickly than similar tests on humans, and the fur removes sunlight as a variable. An adult cat would be an ideal specimen in my opinion.

Of course, I would never ask other cats to submit to a procedure I wouldn't undergo myself, so-- even though it is a great personal sacrifice-- I'm asking Bruce to feed me more cheese snacks during the day. I'm not sure exactly how long it will take to determine with complete confidence that the cheese is helping, but if I have to extend the experiment for two years or even three, it's worth it. After all, I'm doing this for the children.

I feel very confident that this plan will produce a favorable result.

Respectfully submitted,

Ferdinand T. Cat

Trackposted to Outside the Beltway, Perri Nelson's Website, Blog @ MoreWhat.com, Rosemary's Thoughts, guerrilla radio, Adam's Blog, Right Truth, Leaning Straight Up, The Bullwinkle Blog, The Amboy Times, Big Dog's Weblog, Chuck Adkins, Pursuing Holiness, Allie is Wired, DragonLady's World, The World According to Carl, Blue Star Chronicles, Pirate's Cove, The Pink Flamingo, Republican National Convention Blog, CommonSenseAmerica, Dumb Ox Daily News, High Desert Wanderer, Right Voices, and The Yankee Sailor, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.

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You are so brave...*sniffles*


Posted by: Michael at November 28, 2007 1:34 AM

Indeed. For such an amazing show of courage on your part, I think I'd be willing to donate the cheese. If you set up some sort of donor program, please let me know. I assume it would be tax-deductible?


Posted by: Suldog at November 28, 2007 7:44 AM

Its informative thanks for your wonderful post, i have bookmarked your post for others reference....


Posted by: annie at November 29, 2007 4:08 AM

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